Tortured Dolphins Fan: Is It Really This Hopeless?
The Dolphins are reportedly in talks with the Texans to trade for Deshaun Watson in the coming days. Is he really the savior Dolphins fans have been waiting for?
Presenting my season-long column, The Tortured Dolphins Fan. I know it’s already Week 7, but I only just started this Substack. Trust me, my misery caused by this team date back much further than the launch of The Wes Side. Every Sunday morning, let’s commiserate together.
Before getting into Deshaun Watson, let’s take a moment and think back to last Sunday. Try to conjure the emotions you felt as Matthew Wright’s kick sailed through the uprights as time expired in London. What’s the word for that feeling?
Disappointment?
No, not strong enough.
Bitter?
Sure, a little.
How about hopeless?
Oh yeah, baby. That stings just right.
Let’s do the exercise again, but go further back, deeper into your mind grapes. Instead of last Sunday, think back to (ruffles through imaginary file folder) — ah, here it is.
It’s January 2010. Twenty-three-year-old Pat White stumbles near the sideline, Steeler Ike Taylor lunges and his helmet crashes against White’s. White goes limp and is carted off the field. He never played in a regular-season NFL game again.
Oh and this one. Mid-September in 2006. Daunte Culpepper’s Dolphins were down 16-0 to the Bills at the start of the fourth quarter. Culpepper is indecisive and sloppy, and Miami fans begin to chant JOEY, JOEY. Yes, that would be for the incomparable Joey Harrington.
Now further, to 2002, when Ray Lucas fumbles the ball backward…
Hold on, Wes! I can’t take it anymore! Make it stop! Why are you doing this to me? Haven’t we Dolphins fans suffered enough? Are you some kind of masochist?
Sorry, but I put you through that to illustrate a point. That with each new hope at quarterback came crushing disappointment. That every perceived step forward is followed by several steps back.
It speaks to how bleak these last 20 years have been when Watson, an accused sexual predator, is a tantalizing savior.
Sort through the passers over the last two decades — through the Fiedlers, Huards, Lucases, Grieses, Feeleys, Rosenfels, Frerottes, Culpeppers, Harringtons, Lemons, Greens, Becks, Hennes, Thigpens, Moores, Tannehills, Cutlers, Osweilers, Fitzpatricks, Rosens, Brissetts and Tuas. All those failed attempts at stabilizing the franchise contributed to that gut-wrenching feeling as the referees signaled that Wright’s 53-yard field goal was good. None were as special a talent as Watson.
The embroiled Texans quarterback last season averaged more yards than Patrick Mahomes, had a better quarterback rating than Tom Brady and had a completion percentage comparable to Aaron Rodgers’.
Then Watson was accused of sexual misconduct in 22 civil lawsuits filed by women who claim he harassed or assaulted them during massages. Police and the NFL are investigating. The FBI has looked into it. He’s denied those allegations, the details of which are truly abhorrent.
Despite the ongoing investigation, the Dolphins continue to be tied to Watson, who requested to be traded before the allegations. When the rumors first cropped up in August, coach Brian Flores said, “We have a high standard for the people we have in the organization. We want people with high character throughout the building.”
Then the 1-5 start. Today, FiveThirtyEight gives the Fins a 6% chance of making the postseason. Miami’s streak of failing to win a playoff game will extend to 21 years. Naturally, the Houston Chronicle reported this week talks between the Dolphins and Texans ahead of the Nov. 2 trade deadline.
This was supposed to be the year the Dolphins broke through. They surprisingly went 10-6 last season under Flores and Tua Tagovailoa was the blue-chip quarterback destined to make the Dolphins matter again. Instead, Tua’s been hurt, the defense regressed and the offensive line is still a mess.
But trading for Watson now, before the legal issues are resolved, would be nothing short of desperate. Not just because it could cost several first-round picks, but also because it’s unclear if Watson will play this season… or if he’ll be suspended next season… or if he’ll go to jail…
And yet, I gotta admit, it’s still tempting, the possibility of a quarterback in the stratosphere of Mahomes, Rodgers and Brady. After all, elite athletes with serious legal charges in their careers — Kobe Bryant, Michael Vick, Tyreek Hill — won fans over by winning.
…Winning…
It’s worth noting that Watson has yet to be charged for anything. But before signing off on a trade, it must be asked: What if these allegations are proven true?
Would Dolphins fans cheer if Watson wins in Miami? Would we cheer for him the way we cheered for Marino? For Shula? Would we collectively close our eyes, bask in the throws of a Pro-Bowl quarterback and conveniently ignore the man inside the uniform?
Is that the price of a franchise quarterback?
Are things truly that hopeless?
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