đ© The Slap: For as shocking as it was to watch Will Smith smack Chris Rock on the Oscars stage, itâs the extreme lack of self-awareness that followed that has most spoiled his once sky-high approval rating.
After the many movies, songs and beloved TV shows Smith has made over his 30-year career, itâs The Smack that will now be most synonymous with his name. But it was during his acceptance speech after winning the Oscar for best actor for his role as Venus and Serena Williamsâ father in âKing Richardâ that made it clear that this beloved actor who always seemed so, well, cool, is just another Hollywood elite claiming Woe is me.
âI know to do what we do you got to be able to take abuse, you got to have people talk crazy about you,â Smith said, excusing himself for smacking Rock onstage over a joke directed at Jada Pinkett Smith. âIn this business you got to be able to have people disrespecting you. And you got to smile and you got to pretend like thatâs OK.â
Oh, cry me a river, Will.
You mean to tell me that Smith, who is reportedly worth $350 million, has to occasionally handle being disrespected just like â um, let me check here â EVERYBODY?
This isnât a problem reserved for the Hollywood elite. It may seem louder, given their fame, but itâs also much easier. Regular people donât get to assault a colleague and then receive the most prestigious award in their field.
Quickly, a show of hands: Who among us simple civilians, in whatever business we may be in, hasnât been disrespected or taken abuse from a boss, colleague or client?
Did you then get to slap you boss, colleague or client, then carry on with the rest of your career?
Does the telemarketer you rudely hung up on while in the middle of fixing dinner for your children get to leave her desk chair, rattle upon your door and sucker punch you in the face⊠and then get named Employee of the Month?
Of course not. That would be unimaginable.
How about some real-life examplesâŠ
Over the last two years, did Smith take abuse like having to walk into work and learn he was fired or furloughed?
Did Smith take disrespect, like a child being told by his stateâs government that his school teacher canât acknowledge that heâs gay?
Oh, does it suck to have people talk about you? A fraction of the attention Smith and his 62.5 million Instagram followers gets would be welcomed awareness for the thousands of daily victims of sexual assault who feel ignored when they speak up.
No, itâs not Smithâs responsibility to think of everyone else who is hurting when he is hurting. No one should feel guilt about his/her own emotions.
But Smith didnât even apologize to Rock or face any real-life consequences outside of the public shaming before playing the victim of⊠what was it again, disrespect?
Instead, after slapping someone onstage, he was allowed to remain in his front-row seat at the Oscars, accept an award, give an uninterrupted speech (the Academy is not without blame) and then attend an afterparty where he danced to his own music with gold man in hand.
In America â a country that generally believes in equal opportunity and second chances â a slap is forgivable. But Smithâs complete lack of self-awareness in his actions that followed is a slap in the face to everyone else.
Should we smile and pretend thatâs OK?
đ© Bad bar jokes: So â and I know this will come as a shock â Iâve been at a few bars lately. At these bars, people talk to me. Or I talk to them. Actually, no, they talk to me. Or maybe theyâre talking to my fiancĂ©. Anyway, I donât like it. Iâve never been one for small talk, especially with strangers. And thereâs a weird thing that happens with strangers making small talk: the stranger who initiates will often come early with a joke.
But jokes between strangers are never funny. Why? Because they arenât meant to be funny. Because strangers donât know each otherâs sense of humor, the joke is usually something pretty vanilla. âGood luck getting a drinkâ he said with an eye-roll toward the bar tender. Something like that.
So why make the joke in the first place? Well, two reasons. (1.) To break the ice and (2.) to prove you have a sense of humor and thus this ice is worth breaking.
Understanding the purpose of these jokes, Iâve grown to accept them. All in all, itâs a nice thing to do, and the world needs more nice things.
But there are a few jokes that I just wonât tolerate, mostly because they are tired and arenât funny. You wanna talk to me? Work for it. Above all else, I respect creativity.
So here the official list of jokes that should never be told at a bar ever again:
Person A: âHey, is anyone sitting here?â Person B: âYou are.â (This joke is so tired, itâs the equivalent of âDo you want some salt with your fries?â)
âDo you want some salt with your fries?â
âYouâre getting married? ⊠Donât do it.â (This actually happened to me. My fiancĂ© and I were at Flanaganâs and this guy sits down next to us with his wife and told me âdonât do itâ six or seven times. Come to think of it, maybe he wasnât joking.)
âOpa!â when a glass breaks.
âHey, itâs 5 oâclock somewhere.â
đ© What Iâm drinking: Glendalough Double Barrel Irish Whiskey. Got this for $35 recently. Finished in sherry barrels. Itâs hard to find anything with the word âSherryâ on the label for less than $50, but this doesnât taste cheap. The sherry rounds out the end with a subtle sweetness that makes it good for summer drinking.
Cheers!